


I got lost while the sunlight was painting us gold

by Vulpeculate



Category: Fruits Basket, Fruits Basket (Anime 2019), Fruits Basket - Takaya Natsuki (Manga)
Genre: F/M, In which Kyo becomes a father, Kyo's sperm donor is mentioned, Manga Spoilers, My greatest apologies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-01
Updated: 2020-07-01
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:27:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25019278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vulpeculate/pseuds/Vulpeculate
Summary: If he was being honest, the monster that still haunted his dreams didn’t have fangs and claws. It was his father, looming over him with dark eyes and damning accusations. And rage, such unshakable, all-consuming rage.~Kyo becomes a father for the first time. Doubt ensues.
Relationships: Honda Tohru/Sohma Kyou
Comments: 13
Kudos: 82





	I got lost while the sunlight was painting us gold

Children, as unforeseen as any other part of this quiet life he’d found, brought a deep-seated peace to Kyo that he’d never thought would be possible. 

Lying on the floor of the living room of the apartment, arms waving unassumingly, his son blew bubbles out of puckered pink lips. Nestled in blankets and young as he was, the boy had no hope of escape towards the balcony door that had been slid open. Kyo watched the breeze float in and rustle the young boy’s hair, the auburn lit like fire by the late afternoon sun. 

Truthfully, Kyo thought he was the most beautiful child he’d ever seen. 

Hajime babbled to himself, chubby hands reaching to the dust sparkling in a ray of sunshine. Kyo couldn’t take his eyes off him. In the beginning, when he’d first seen the boy in Tohru’s arms, he’d felt nothing but fear. Tiny as he was, red and screaming something awful, Kyo had never felt more terror interacting with another human being on earth. His heart had pounded in his chest, every cell in his body fighting with each other in just how to deal with this unfamiliar presence. 

“I was thinking,” Tohru had said, voice raised slightly to be heard over the wailing child. She had spoken the words between soothing him, and Kyo had stared with wonder in how she seemed to know just what to do within moments of meeting this new person. “That is, I know we didn’t-well, we didn’t really get a chance to-“

“Tohru.”

She had blushed, the exhaustion of the day catching up with her. “Sorry, um, I was thinking that...Hajime, well, I think it would be a good name for our son.”

_ Our son.  _

If he was being honest, the monster that still haunted his dreams didn’t have fangs and claws. It was his father, looming over him with dark eyes and damning accusations. And rage, such unshakable, all-consuming rage. The years that Kyo had spent accepting his role in his mother’s death seemed to have dissipated when he stared into his son’s eyes for the first time, and he was a little boy again, uncertain and scared of what he did not understand. It had taken Tohru’s look of concern, and Kazuma’s entrance into the hospital room for Kyo to acknowledge his wife’s words. Even more prodding, and an appraising look from his adoptive father, for him to take the baby into his arms. 

“I think that’s a fine name,” Kazuma had said, and Tohru had smiled. All the while, Kyo had felt pieces of himself both come apart and fall into place. He wondered what his father had felt, when he’d seen his son the first time. He wondered if he’d cared, if he’d known what it was to be a father. Kyo knew first hand that even if the man’s intentions had once been good, he had failed miserably. 

Would Kyo’s intentions to erase his father’s mistakes end in the same way?

(Hours later, when Kazuma found him collapsed against the wall in the hallway, head in his hands, he’d simply sat next to him and grasped his shoulder tightly.)

Hajime whined, and Kyo saw tears begin to form at the corners of his eyes. Murmuring sounds of affection, Kyo lifted the boy into his arms and began to rock him gently. 

Kyo had been given two fathers in life, both of whom had approached fatherhood in their own way. There had been a time when Kyo had thought that he could only follow in the footsteps of the first man, who had broken his family so thoroughly. But the second man, who had taken in a boy despite having no obligation to do so, who had cared for that boy deeply, showed him a different way. 

Holding his son close, watching his eyes flutter closed as he lost the fight against sleep, he remembered what Kazuma had said to him years ago.  _ Hope will return to you, again and again.  _

With the sunlight streaming in, the weight of his son dreaming in his arms, he knew that his father had been right. 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope y'all liked this, it's my first time posting a fic in five years!


End file.
